Understand what keeps happening.
Decide what to change.
Virtual individual therapy for adults in New York and New Jersey.
A practical, thoughtful approach to understanding yourself and making changes.
15 minutes · phone or video · private-pay inquiries
Working with individuals & couples
Start with what you need help with.
Individual therapy
When overthinking, pressure or familiar patterns are getting in the way, therapy offers space to understand them and work toward change.
Couples mediation
Work on the disagreement you keep returning to, and what happens between you when you try to resolve it.
Divorce mediation
A structured, neutral process for working through practical decisions about separation and what comes next.
What working together is like.
I’m Dr. Alan Winder, a Clinical Psychologist and Certified Couples Mediator. I’ve been working with individuals and couples for more than 20 years.
I tend to be practical and direct, but I also think it’s important to understand why something keeps happening rather than just trying to make it stop. Sometimes the work is about understanding yourself better. Sometimes it’s about making a concrete change. Usually it’s some of both.
Your values, beliefs, relationships and responsibilities are part of the work. My role is to help you understand yourself and your situation more clearly, not to make decisions for you.
When your strengths start getting in the way.
Being analytical, anticipating problems, taking responsibility, and pushing yourself can take you a long way. But those qualities don’t work equally well everywhere.
You may find yourself overthinking something that can’t be solved, taking responsibility for things that aren’t entirely yours, or having trouble relaxing. The goal is to understand where those qualities are serving you and where they’re getting in your way.
A first conversation
Start with a free introduction
A free, 15-minute phone or video conversation about what you’re looking for and whether I may be able to help.
This calendar is for private-pay inquiries. For individual-therapy insurance questions, please contact the practice first. Fit and ongoing appointment availability are confirmed directly.
Individual therapy is virtual throughout New York and New Jersey.
View fees, payment and Good Faith Estimate information. The free introduction is separate from the paid focused consultation.
Prefer to ask a question first? Get in touch.
Free resources
Choose an exercise for what feels stuck.
Try an educational exercise on your own, without signing up. You don’t need to complete one before asking for help.
When one worry leads to another
Choose a thinking pattern, try a brief exercise, and notice what changes, if anything.
When the same argument keeps coming back
Start with one recent conversation. Make two choices to find an exercise and words you can try.
When a separation decision feels stuck
Choose one issue. Sort out what you know, what information is missing, and what you want understood.
When you feel pulled in two directions
Consider your reasons to change and your reasons to keep things as they are, without forcing a decision.
For organizations & professional teams
A clinical perspective beyond the consulting room.
Talks, workshops and consultation grounded in clinical practice, with attention to how people understand problems, make decisions and use technology.